Is this part of bipolar disorder or is he just a jerk? How do I cope? My husband, who takes medication typically given to people with bipolar disorder (depakote + an antidepressant), did things tonight that are fairly typical of him and leave me feeling really distant from him and wondering if my kids should be away from this man. First, I mentioned things we needed from a store. He said, "Let's go in a few minutes." He rarely wants to go anywhere, so this was a surprise. He was playing a computer game and we'd just finished dinner. Our oldest son didn't like the dinner - it was a dish I know he doesn't like, but the rest of us do. So, while I was doing dishes, I was cooking hamburgers for our son. My husband quit his game suddenly and said, "Let's go." I said - I'm cleaning the kitchen, I'll be done soon. He replied - Why Don't you just admit you don't want me to go to the store with you? I said, "I wasn't expecting to go right away, I need to clean the kitchen." Then, our oldest came in and sat down. My husband said - "Where's ____ [our oldest]?" Our youngest said, "He's in the kitchen." Husband said, "Well, your mother said she wouldn't make people a separate supper if they didn't eat the meal she prepared, so you can't trust either of them." Silence from the rest of us. While husband was playing the computer game, he was cursing and complaining that the the game was not treating him fairly (online game) and that his weapons weren't working. Youngest son tried to explain how it might work better, how the server affects things. Then, when the game ended, husband had come in 4th place. Son said, "See, you did pretty good, you beat lots of people." Husband said, "Why don't you make up your mind? First you say I suck, now you say I did well." Normally, I would try to tell him not to talk to the kids like this, but a marriage counselor said I've got to stop this, because he yells, I yell, and the kids are upset. But, I can't stand this atmosphere for my kids. If we divorced, I can't imagine them being alone with him, during his visitation, which I'm sure, since he's a successful person outwardly, the courts would certainly give him. Also, we homeschool, which the kids love, and if we divorced, that would end, and they'd see little of me as I worked to support us. So, I don't really see leaving or staying as good options. These comments to the kids are typical, not as bad as some occasions. Are they part of bipolar? If I'm not supposed to ask him not to talk this way - as it just provokes him and makes him say much worse things, even in front of the kids - what am I supposed to do? One day, we were walking and he hurt himself. I should have inquired about his pain, but he let loose in pubic with such a string of obscenities, that I first said, "Did you take your medicine today?" He started screaming really loudly then. I said, "This upsets the kids, please talk quietly." He said, "No, I want them to know what a bitch you are." Of course, he's screaming that! He said everyone needs to know how awful I am. Especially the kids. Sob... We've been married for 24 years. Yes, after years of this, after years of soothing, cooing, reassuring, I am exhausted, and I do feel distant, because I can't take all of this what feels like abuse to me. I'm not concerned that the meds are doing this. He's much better with the meds, actually. But, he's on meds and doing this. As re: homeschooling - despite the stereotypes, my kids spend lots of time with other kids. They very much value and enjoy that time, and they probably have more opportunities to hang and talk than kids who go to school. (We unschool, no structured lessons.) Peaches - ever since learning about it 20 years ago, I have felt he has borderline personality disorder.